What is the secret to long lasting affair?

[YELLOW]

she and i meet up everiday. we hold hands look into each others eyes and take care of each others emotional and physical needs. a marriage i ll nvr hav this life......

[yaber]

Why want a long lasting one? I prefer move on. Don't leave any emotion baggage behind. Stress free.

[tansy]

Few years back I was involved in an affair like you and it lasted for 2 years plus. I wanted to bring the rs further up a level after the affair was exposed. If I had waited a little longer, maybe I could be his gf by now. However, I wasn't ready to take the heartbreak that comes together with this affair. Not only I felt broken from the countless "breakups" and "patching up", the wife and him were broken from it aa well. I eventually decided to give up and went on with another guy to be happy again.

What I want to say is that it is not possible to carry on like this forever. The affair will always be a dream, and to make it a reality requires a lot of heartbreaking moments you, the husband, the guy and the wife will have to endure.

[VOGS]

I have an affair with an ex colleague which lasted 4yrs till date, till now. She knows I am married right from the start. Well, I personally feel it's never easy to sustain a rs like this. Several times of quarrel lead to she telling me she wants a break up or threaten not to go for the upcoming trip which was booked months back. I hate this feeling of being threatened every now and then. The quarrel is due to she being petty over some remarks made by me where she couldn't take it. I agreed with u guys that such an affair is a dream. She always has initiated a break up by telling me what could u give me, nothing. As such, I told her fine, u r free to move. End up till now, we are still tgt. Then, she says let's continue being tgt first. She is 27 this year and I am 37 without kids. I feel at times I am kinda wasting her youth but again don't wanna lose her. My frds have been advising me just fuck only, don't think too much. The day she decides to leave, let her go. Saying is easier than done.

[Curiouscoupl3]

Dear TS, I wanted to say the secret is don't get caught but after reading on your situation, all I can say is you cannot. To have one is crazy and requires a lot of understand from both sides.

This is where the problem arises- you can only control your side. The moment the understanding and "commitment" to the affair is not equal, doubts will start to grow and will start eating up what you have (which you shouldn't have in the first place).

You may not want to end it but you just need to prepare yourself that it will end eventually and accept the fact. You can only r part to try to keep it but this will also cause problems where you will think he doesn't care or appreciate you.

If you want to keep it, I would just tell you enjoy it while it lasts and be thankful for the good times. If it ends, go look for another one