Matters of the Heart.Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.
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Marriage all boils down to money. And it is very very important. Because the constant squabbles by couples, is all co releated to this evil being called money.
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Money can buy anything in this world. I finally understand what it means. Cause even your wife has a price on it.
Not to offend you - but I don't think it is marriage in your case. It's more like being KC-ed for life and have to spend whole lifetime feeding a mistress / sugar baby. Probably it's a mistake from your side to accept a wife who is that materialistic, choosing to ask for expensive trip and 5 star hotel instead of thinking & caring for her husband & 2 children. Why would she want children at all if all she cares about are those luxurious experience? And why didn't you have the courage to leave her earlier?
A wife deserves to be respected when she behaves like one. This woman deserves to be treated as a mistress / WL / sugar baby and can be discarded anytime once you can't afford her. I guess both you and her didn't realize this
Money is not always the requirement for a happy marriage. Just look at the happy couples with the wives working all day at restaurants, hawker center supporting their husbands in bad times and come back to a happy family.
i agree with everything u have stated tho the MORTAGE of 30yrs is STANDARD in every western country, i took out a mortage aged 20, bought the house for 180k now i am practically debt free on this house i only have 260k left becasue i took out 300k to buy shares but the house is worth 1 mill, i am in my 30s, so YES definately taking out a mortage of 30yrs is teh right thing to do
sorry bro.
I am curious on your investment. 180k in Singapore? Or overseas. Not sure what you can buy for 180k in Singapore. HDB 2 br for elderly might prove tough.
Based on Singapore laws, under 21 cannot buy. Of course I am keen to know how you use equity term loan to gear out 300k. When you do, you cant say you are debt free because you took up a new loan. But if you are going by valuation 1mil and you paid 180k for it, then on paper maybe. Which country was this bought in?
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The Best Way to overcome heart break is in the arms of another. You focus on making money, you get girls, you focus on your body, you get sex, you focus on the girl, you get NOTHING but heartache and disappointment
overseas i bought in pre 2000...u sure in singapore during that time cant find affordbale houseing for 180k?
Sure. 180k can get HDB pre 2000. But as you said you were in your 20s. So your purchase is not local. Thanks for clarifying. In fact now you can get HDB below 180k too, well if you accept the lower tenure and you are of a certain age from HDB. Also your 180k if downpayment of 20%(was less in the day of 10%) meant since 20-30s you needed to pay 80-90% loan. That's a huge amount of monthly instalment. So did you rent it out to offset the monthly payments? You are very wealthy to have 180k to put down as D/P at 20.
However you mentioned taking a equity term loan for shares. So it is not HDB that you got because banks would not grant you a loan on your increase in valuation, anyway legally you couldn't have bought a hdb at 20.
Saw some overseas Malaysian ones across the causeway, 700 ringgit, now already 1400 ringgit after 5 years. Lots of opportunities. Made money on a Australia apartment that I sold back in the day when I was living there. That was a very good investment.
Just needed to frame it properly. Private, Public housing. Local, Overseas.
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The Best Way to overcome heart break is in the arms of another. You focus on making money, you get girls, you focus on your body, you get sex, you focus on the girl, you get NOTHING but heartache and disappointment
Last edited by Shadow_warrior; 09-06-2017 at 04:37 PM.
Being a married man with 2 kids, and on the verge of divorce, let me shared my point of view. No speculation needed, and its true life encounter.
Marriage is a lifelong journey, when I first married at age 24 years old, all was not well financially. I hold a "golden rice bowl" job. But I don't find the gold in the bowl.
In fact, that should have been a warning sign to me, but truth be told, I have not much choice either.
Marriage all boils down to money. And it is very very important. Because the constant squabbles by couples, is all co releated to this evil being called money.
It is not about how much you have,cause it will never be enough.
Media,FB,TV fake news, all play a unrealistic view on the REAL live on normal human living day to day.
I can bring my wife to Malaysia, to Taiwan to Thailand for holiday, but I still get slam for it. Simple reason, why no Australia, Europe Japan etc. Cause ALL her friends are doing it. And posting over it in social media to let others envy them.
But there can be a thousands reason why "these friends" can afford it. A few I can suggest, they are really rich, they found a golden pig to take care of them, they strike lottery, they used up their few years saving to just go on this trip because they have no commitment like kids, or worse case, they swipe their credit cards to go on trips. But all this reasoning, becomes "unreal" because her friends are all doing it and posting on social media.
Even you afford to go these places, next come the lodging, can we stay 5 stars hotel?
This topic will never ends. Those who wish to enter into marriage, have to look at oneself financial situation, and also the expectation of the spouses, and note this, first year of marriage expectation, can differs in the 3rd or 10th year.
It also depend on who she has met, who has brainwashed her during your journey in marriage.
It can be her co colleague, her bosses, whoever is hitting on her, giving her all the niceities in life, and brainwashed her that she deserve better.
Singapore sadly to say, is not conducive for a marriage to last long because of the many temptation, false truth, unrealistic expectation.
Singapore is the only country that thinks taking a housing loan of 30 years is the right thing to do. Binding us to 30 years of uncertainties, making us unwanted slave to society.
Money can buy anything in this world. I finally understand what it means. Cause even your wife has a price on it.
Bro, i am sad to hear your story and what you are going through.
May i suggest this to you and all who are reading this if you had felt the same as our bro here:
Overcome your problems with your wealth, with you being rich !
The question is not whether you can solve your problem or not.
The question is whether you are willing to pay the price to solve your problem or not.
I hear way to many people complaining Singapore is a difficult place to find a living. And yet are you aware of many from Phil, Viet, Thailand, Indonesia they are so happy and proud they are making $800 a month here?
Why can they be happy and you can be unhappy? Because back home their lives are simpler.
But since you are living in Singapore, you are GIVEN the opportunity to become rich. Why are you not using this environment to make yourself rich?
There are plenty of opportunities here and for the base, here it is very safe. If you made a mistake, nobody dare to kill you.
So this country provides lots of room for you to work and try your best.
The most you loose is your time, and money.... never your life
In closing, may i quote Bill Gates:
If you are born poor, its not your fault.
If you die poor, it is all your fault.
Why so, because today, as you are reading this, you are still sitting there and ask why am i poor, why is my wife so unhappy with me, why my girlfriend leave me, why this and why that... o all because Singapore is so hard to make a living, etc.
Get your butt out there and start to work on your arse!
I have been poor and i have become rich.
I did not become rich because i was more lucky then anyone here.
I worked my arse off to let myself now able to sit on residual incomes and continue to go holiday at my choosing anytime and any day... why?
Because i paid for this day years ago!
I hope this helps all of you and i seriously meant it well for you
being a married man with 2 kids, and on the verge of divorce, let me shared my point of view. No speculation needed, and its true life encounter.
Marriage is a lifelong journey, when i first married at age 24 years old, all was not well financially. I hold a "golden rice bowl" job. But i don't find the gold in the bowl.
In fact, that should have been a warning sign to me, but truth be told, i have not much choice either.
Marriage all boils down to money. And it is very very important. Because the constant squabbles by couples, is all co releated to this evil being called money.
It is not about how much you have,cause it will never be enough.
Media,fb,tv fake news, all play a unrealistic view on the real live on normal human living day to day.
I can bring my wife to malaysia, to taiwan to thailand for holiday, but i still get slam for it. Simple reason, why no australia, europe japan etc. Cause all her friends are doing it. And posting over it in social media to let others envy them.
But there can be a thousands reason why "these friends" can afford it. A few i can suggest, they are really rich, they found a golden pig to take care of them, they strike lottery, they used up their few years saving to just go on this trip because they have no commitment like kids, or worse case, they swipe their credit cards to go on trips. But all this reasoning, becomes "unreal" because her friends are all doing it and posting on social media.
Even you afford to go these places, next come the lodging, can we stay 5 stars hotel?
This topic will never ends. Those who wish to enter into marriage, have to look at oneself financial situation, and also the expectation of the spouses, and note this, first year of marriage expectation, can differs in the 3rd or 10th year.
It also depend on who she has met, who has brainwashed her during your journey in marriage.
It can be her co colleague, her bosses, whoever is hitting on her, giving her all the niceities in life, and brainwashed her that she deserve better.
Singapore sadly to say, is not conducive for a marriage to last long because of the many temptation, false truth, unrealistic expectation.
Singapore is the only country that thinks taking a housing loan of 30 years is the right thing to do. Binding us to 30 years of uncertainties, making us unwanted slave to society.
Money can buy anything in this world. I finally understand what it means. Cause even your wife has a price on it.
__________________
The Best Way to overcome heart break is in the arms of another. You focus on making money, you get girls, you focus on your body, you get sex, you focus on the girl, you get NOTHING but heartache and disappointment
If the person is right... ( Chose wisely before marriage )
You won't regret marrying...
Happy ever After isn't same for everyone.
Sometimes things get mundane, repetitive, dry even annoying...
Always revive the flames, reignite passion and remind My vows and my role.
Love After few years of marriage, needs effort to go on. If one dun feed it, it dies off.
I'm still figuring out... It is only 5th year...
Maybe at 20th year I would have wiser words for myself...
__________________
Fashion fades, only style remains the same.
~Coco Chanel
If the person is right... ( Chose wisely before marriage )
You won't regret marrying...
Happy ever After isn't same for everyone.
Sometimes things get mundane, repetitive, dry even annoying...
Always revive the flames, reignite passion and remind My vows and my role.
Love After few years of marriage, needs effort to go on. If one dun feed it, it dies off.
I'm still figuring out... It is only 5th year...
Maybe at 20th year I would have wiser words for myself...
Haha at the 5th year it's still fresh. Try hitting the 10s
Age catches up. People change with age. Things get stale. You get tired
Then the desire and effort changes
__________________
The Best Way to overcome heart break is in the arms of another. You focus on making money, you get girls, you focus on your body, you get sex, you focus on the girl, you get NOTHING but heartache and disappointment
Just treat your wife like a chicken rice. The first few years everything is good and delicious. After third, fourth, fifth year and counting you are going to start wanting to vomit and wanting to try new dishes. People stay on for the sake of their children, their future, and sex is almost non existent. So usually the horny husband usually eat outside without the wife's knowledge. They still go out as one happy family despite no sex involved. As long as the wife does not find out the family can still function but the problem is due to advancement of technology such as FB, eat outside not only apply to husband but wife too.