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  #46  
Old 05-08-2007, 10:05 PM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Since you feel comfortable enough with this medium of communication (sammyboy) to share so much of your story, why don't you write the rest of your experiences and treat this as a blog? I'm sure you didn't use your real name.

If you do so, you can draw on a variety of opinions to decide what you can do from now on. Instead of facing a situation alone and not knowing what to do except to let it out via an internet forum, why not use this internet forum to source for solutions on how to move on from here?
  #47  
Old 06-08-2007, 02:51 AM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Be it getting FL, ONS, or FB for bonging, I guess everyone need a reason to convince oneself to go forward with the action. I have friend who said Geylang is not a place that he will step into. Until he was brought to the CAT150 8-9 yr back, he mentioned that the place is secluded.

Now he frequently went there to walk walk Lor 8-10. And married with a kid now, he still pull me down with him when he able to...

In short, everyone just need a first reason to go do the "bastard" action.
  #48  
Old 06-08-2007, 03:33 AM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

10Q for your story, thank Sammyboy for the opportunity to release your pent-up regrets....

My take is that, she's grown up maturely & so should you (free yourself fro the guilt) She's forgiven herself for all those silly mistakes of wrong-friends, delinquencies she might hav done previously, so you've also firgive yourself & forget "The Bastard" in the old you.

As she puts it "That's not the way to lead life". You hav to go through the "Baptism of Fire" to free yourself fro blame and guilt. Carry on with your responsible family life, anew & afresh from those taunting regrets. Her optimism in life has redeemed your self-guilt. Jus treat her "responsibly" whichever way both of you wants to carry on tiz relationship.

If threaded "Responsibly & Sensibly", tiz relationship could be describe more as a 'Soul-mate' / Confidant level in future. Try to minimise physical contacts, if meeting up best if in public places, hav your (or her's) spouse ard. Maybe being good-family friends???? Confiding/contacts could B either through phone calls periodically, sms or net-chats. Tat way both of U could reduce physical temptations.

Jus my thoughts, whether it works still depends on both your determination.
But just remember the consequences B4 allowing sexual temptations get the better of you both. Thread cautiously, draw the lines clearly with her & speak out for her opinion & draw your conclusion fro her opinion (whether she can maintain future friendship wth U without any sexual innuedos) N best of luck!
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  #49  
Old 06-08-2007, 09:40 AM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Quote:
Originally Posted by Freman View Post
... I don't know what the future will bring. or what will happen.
My resolve is notoriously weak...
Bro nobody knows what the future will bring. Somehow, call it fate, luck whatever, you've been able to find closure. I think that's the main thing.
But...be careful that you don't get into a relationship, in moments like this most people are very vulnerable. Cheers!
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  #50  
Old 06-08-2007, 09:53 AM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Bro Freman, I dont think you should worry too much over this, or feel remorseful. This happen quite some time liao. And from wat I gather, she is a willing party, wat eveil did you do, having sex with her??, she enjoy it Im sure, also a listening ear (whether u care or not is inconsequential), so just see how it goes the next time u meet up, maybe nothing, she just wants to be fren (though platonic frens between ger n man not likely) .... but all said, u shouldnt be too worried about this unless u intend to make her your FB, which is also not a problem, a lot of bros also hv FB ... as long as no strings attached, unless you want to hv a string attached .... all this up to you lah ... we cant really make any decisions for you because we donno what your thinking is ..
  #51  
Old 06-08-2007, 10:20 AM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Actually, I'd suggest both of you get out of the situation. Emotions are a funny thing. Before you know it, both of you will have wrecked marriages.
  #52  
Old 06-08-2007, 03:49 PM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

hi bro,

yeah, right now, things are moving at their own pace. We have since chatted more on msn and looking for activities like supper etc, cos she have her night classes.

as for whether I will update the progress in this forum or like a blog, well, the intention is not this from the beginning.

as mentioned, this relationship may not be those wild and sexy stuff that will make a good story.

I'm glad I wrote about it, my short 3 posting episode of this part of my life. What I'm trying to convey is the miracle of life, how events and things can happen when you thought it's all in the past.

Take heart to all brothers who gave comments, every one of them is valuable.
  #53  
Old 06-08-2007, 04:13 PM
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Cool Re: Confession of a bastard

hey bro..

glad that you are able to let go this stuff.. deep down in you. so many years have past, and i believe the girl is trying her best to return everything to normal.. her studies... etc.. and you, becoming more mature as the day goes on.. so, maybe this is the time for you not to do the same mistake again.. maybe you wanna try to assist her in her studies or whatever..

just my thought
  #54  
Old 07-08-2007, 09:01 PM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Dedicate this song to adeline,

愛情轉移 by eason chan

徘徊過多少櫥窗 
住過多少旅館 
才會覺得分離也并不冤枉
感情是用來瀏覽 
還是用來珍藏 
好讓日子天天都過得難忘

熬過了多久患難 
濕了多長眼眶 
才能知道傷感是愛的遺産
流浪幾張雙人床 
換過幾次信仰 
才讓戒指義無反顧的交換

*把一個人的溫暖 
轉移到另一個的胸膛 
讓上次犯的錯反省出夢想
每個人都是這樣 
享受過提心吊膽 
才拒絕做愛情待罪的羔羊
回憶是抓不到的月光握緊就變黑暗 
等虛假的背影消失於晴朗
陽光在身上流轉 
等所有業障被原諒 
愛情不停站 
想開往地老天荒 
需要多勇敢

燭光照亮了晚餐 
照不出個答案 
戀愛不是溫馨的請客吃飯
床單上鋪滿花瓣 
擁抱讓它成長 
太擁擠就開到了別的土壤

感情需要人接班 
接近換來期望 
期望帶來失望的惡性循環
短暫的總是浪漫 
漫長總會不滿 
燒完美好青春換一個老伴

Repeat *,*

你不要失望 
蕩氣迴腸是爲了 
最美的平凡
  #55  
Old 07-08-2007, 10:49 PM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Go for it bro, waiting for you report
  #56  
Old 08-08-2007, 12:18 AM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Quote:
Originally Posted by Freman View Post
hi bro,

yeah, right now, things are moving at their own pace. We have since chatted more on msn and looking for activities like supper etc, cos she have her night classes.

as mentioned, this relationship may not be those wild and sexy stuff that will make a good story.
Confession is good for the soul, despite the fact that it offers no absolution from past sins unless one is truly penitent.

Freman, are you truly penitent?

Call me a cynical bastard but I can't wait for the confession that you have, once again, against your better judgment, ONZ'd her at some sleazy hotel.
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  #57  
Old 08-08-2007, 12:52 PM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Quote:
Originally Posted by spider_j View Post
Confession is good for the soul, despite the fact that it offers no absolution from past sins unless one is truly penitent.

Freman, are you truly penitent?

Call me a cynical bastard but I can't wait for the confession that you have, once again, against your better judgment, ONZ'd her at some sleazy hotel.
hi bro,

we cheongster here are never saint in the first place. And my confession was not meant to repent from cheonging.

my regret is in the way I handled her in the past.

if it happens this time round, then let it be. I hoped she knows how to handle her own relationship well. I don't hope that she will destroy it because of this. Believe it or not, I'll probably advise her to think of her long term.

okie okie, I give up, I'll choose a better hotel this time.
  #58  
Old 08-08-2007, 01:32 PM
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Agathys Agathys is offline
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Re: Confession of a bastard

bro just forgive and forget...
  #59  
Old 08-08-2007, 01:41 PM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Quote:
Originally Posted by Freman View Post

my regret is in the way I handled her in the past.

if it happens this time round, then let it be.I don't hope that she will destroy it because of this. Believe it or not, I'll probably advise her to think of her long term.

okie okie, I give up, I'll choose a better hotel this time.
Looks like there WILL be a FR after all then. As the saying goes, it takes 2 hands to clap and 2 sets of loins to bump against each other. Hope that you will refrain for the sake of the "remorse" which you have expressed.
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  #60  
Old 08-08-2007, 05:10 PM
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Re: Confession of a bastard

Quote:
Originally Posted by Freman View Post
Dedicate this song to adeline,

愛情轉移 by eason chan
Very good choice there. I'm been mesmerized by the same song recently and can't get it off my head. Deeply meaningful lyrics.

Your personal account moved me a great deal emotionally. I guess most of us can empathise with your experience. We all feel like bastards once in awhile when we bothered to look back to our younger, insensitive days. Well, SOME of us did anyway.

Never expected such heavy materials when I clicked on your post but thankful for the "soul cleansing" all the same. Your recollection is weighing heavily on my mind now. Perhaps when I can sort out my thoughts better I would have more substantial offerings.

All the moment, best of luck to your (new found?) friendship.
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