Need some opinions :)

littleredmill · #1 25-09-2012, 11:44 PM

Hi, was wondering how you all feel about going to prostitutes?

I mean it's not something you will be able to be proud of and it is mainly for you to satisfy your needs. Is it something you can tell others? Like your gf/wife or partner? How will they feel about it if you were to tell them?

I really hope I don't get flamed for this because I'm someone who will never go to prostitutes and I really wish I could understand more from some bros here who have went before.

I find it hard to even do it with my ex-gf in the past because I feel like I should give the woman I marry my first time. I know it probably sound absurd to some of you since most woman have already given their first time away. I wish my ex-gf did keep her virginity though since I made an effort to keep the both of us a virgin. I still remember the day when I was on top of her and I told her that I love her. It immediately struck me that I said that three words not because I really mean it at that time, I mean I really love her but at that time it was like.. it's because I was on top of her and I'm about to enter.

I'm not really a saint but I'm in this forum because I want to read up more and I see it as a knowledge gaining experience since I'm afraid that I will screw up my first time hahahah especially if my partner is not a virgin and I'm afraid that I won't be able to satisfy her.

I will really value all your feedback and it will all be appreciated. Hopefully you all can also share with me about your first time. Like what were you all thinking and how you feel about it? I heard from some people, some they regret it and some they think it's alright. I think it's because having sex makes someone feel really good and besides if you have done it, there's no going back. So we all have different views regarding this issue.

I did try to talk to my friends. Ok actually I didn't because they always laugh at me. I mean they all done it with their gf at that time, so I believe you all know how much I have been mocked at. LOL.

threetreasure · #2 26-09-2012, 05:34 PM

hi TS, my personal opinion is as follow,

ask urself a qns do u really love a girl regardless of whether she is a virgin or not a virgin? if u really love her, then do u mind if she is not virgin? if u mind she is not virgin then is that consider real love? i dun know, u ask urself...

the ideal case is both u n the girl are virgin (think tis is wad u r trying to go and hope for) at the time of marriage. but really will it be the ideal case happen for u? we dun know or even u urself oso may not know.. bcos u wont know ur gf or eventually ur wife is a virgin or not.. if let say she is not virgin, then do u still love her n if yes then do u mind she is not virgin? come back to the above qns.

if u think u want keep ur virgin till ur marriage.. then go ahead.. dun go to prostitute, FL, one-nite stand or wadever.. maybe u should not even come to this forum at all.. bcos there could be alot of temptation here that u may "lose" ur virgin before the marriage.. haha...

DegenerationX · #3 26-09-2012, 05:51 PM

Dear TS, my advice is don't give your first time to commercial sex. Yes, I agree that going to prostitutes is not something to be proud of (of cos you can be proud and boast in SBF lah) but it is also not something to be ashamed of. Of cos we can't tell wife/gf.

Try to give your first time to anyone else except prostitutes, be it ONS, FB or whatever. As for the feeling after doing the first time, just like Princles slogan "Once you pop, you can't stop!"

spidey7 · #4 26-09-2012, 06:07 PM

TS sbf here all FL Gals r hookies. Dun like dun call. Simple as tt.

alan0338 · #5 26-09-2012, 06:38 PM

u shouldnt have sex b4 marriage ...

or if really need to fuck, then should go and kio kuay so as to learn where is the correct hole to poke ...

still can get ang bao ...

littleredmill · #6 29-09-2012, 07:02 PM

Thanks for all your reply. The reason why I'm here is because I want to read up more.

I don't think I will ever go to FLs but ONS is another problem, I'm not good looking but I do have my chances that I didn't take. I mean I'm trying to keep my virginity as long as I could, best is until marriage to the woman I love.

Personally I could say I wouldn't mind if she's not a virgin and I am, but I can't be sure on that I never had a gf before whereby I ask her if she's a virgin or not.

kazer · #7 30-09-2012, 03:55 PM

listen to your conscience .. if you feel sth not right, then don't do it .. there's nothing wrong there. don't tell people, everyone has a different view and in today's society certain things are imposed on us. to me having a gf is bullshit, but can't tell anyone. everybody believes it's normal and a must. let them think that way. as for prostitutes, it's personal.. it's a an angel/devil thing.

Ichigo_Kurosaki · #8 30-09-2012, 07:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by littleredmill

I find it hard to even do it with my ex-gf in the past because I feel like I should give the woman I marry my first time. I know it probably sound absurd to some of you since most woman have already given their first time away. I wish my ex-gf did keep her virginity though since I made an effort to keep the both of us a virgin. I still remember the day when I was on top of her and I told her that I love her. It immediately struck me that I said that three words not because I really mean it at that time, I mean I really love her but at that time it was like.. it's because I was on top of her and I'm about to enter.

Quote:

Originally Posted by littleredmill

I mean I'm trying to keep my virginity as long as I could, best is until marriage to the woman I love.

Personally I could say I wouldn't mind if she's not a virgin and I am, but I can't be sure on that I never had a gf before whereby I ask her if she's a virgin or not.

I a bit confused over here

Anyway, today is Mid-Autumn Festival so I am just gonna say sweet as mooncake words. I think you should just stay as virgin until marriage.

Just for you ONLY: Your virginity makes you a person that stands out, it increases your value. It's something that you only have once. You give it to someone who is most important to you. It's the ultimate test of true love- make her wait for marriage, and it is sure to show whether or not she loves you...................

But...............As I do not know how very young are you.............You might wanna think it this way also, throughout your course of life, you may have more than 1-2 girlfriends, if you don't DO IT, the guy that comes after you SURE DO IT. In life, there's no "I should have know or should have done it" cos we only live once and living in present!!! As unlike a female's virginity which is consumable (Once gone, bo-liao), it is really not worth to hold on to a worthless "male virgin" title. Anyway, may the force be with you before you enter

Ichigo_Kurosaki · #9 30-09-2012, 07:41 PM

As for sex services, just think of it as Fast Food. Fast food gets blamed for contributing to many health problems but they offer quick meals that are convenient, they are inexpensive meals compared to restaurants and fast food outlets are responding to consumers' desire for healthier fare.

Of cos, too much of anything is never good nor healthy, moderation is best cos we need to protect ourselves

Iloveschgirls · #10 30-09-2012, 08:04 PM

Personally I feel that male virginity are really insignificant.
Unless u currently have a partner whom u intent to settle down with, I don't see the point in keeping it any further.
Hell, sexual inexperience might even be a undesirable trait when dating women.
Just go have some fun dude.

littleredmill · #11 30-09-2012, 10:31 PM

Thanks for all your feedback yea that was what I'm worried about somehow. Like no one really values virginity these days. I understand what you all mean by some other guy would take a girl's virginity away anyway. The thing is the reason why I don't do it is because I don't wanna take away hers and I also wish to save mine, maybe that is what made it easier.

I'm just afraid that I will be lack of experience in future if the person I'm going to have sex with has done it before. I have done mostly a lot of things sexually but not penetration. I just feel that, I shouldn't do it.

But how do you all feel? Like your first time, what were you all thinking then? Or it's little brother's brain at work? Hahaha

littleredmill · #12 30-09-2012, 10:35 PM

Anyway I'm 22 this year but it's hard to say. I mean some people are already expose to sexual stuff when they are really young, some are those who really maybe never even held women's hand before.

So far I'm rather happy for myself in a sense that I did what I feel is the right thing to do so far even though I don't really have anyone standing on my side. Not even the girls. LOL.

kazer · #13 01-10-2012, 03:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by littleredmill

Thanks for all your feedback yea that was what I'm worried about somehow. Like no one really values virginity these days.

I'm just afraid that I will be lack of experience in future

As I said before ... It's personal belief. You respect others' views and they'll respect yours. These things can be discussed until forever. There's something called philosophy.

--------

No such thing as inexperienced in sex .. It's naturally in you, don't worry. Its not like learning how to fly a plane.

Wizrd · #14 01-10-2012, 04:24 AM

Alrighty, from what I can gather, below is roughly what you are saying...

Whether the girl you will marry is a virgin or not...you intend to keep your virginity until marriage.

That part is fine.

You said you probably won't mind if she is not a virgin....that part is fine too...

Here s my humble take on your questions...

In your mind, you obviously put a lot of value on being a virgin for your eventual wife...that means, despite what you say...deep inside, you believe that a non-virgin is somewhat less deserving or worthy of the sanctity of marriage...(otherwise, why would you do it?)

Should you find a virgin to get married to...all maybe fine and honky dory...but should your eventual spouse not be a virgin...while you say it's ok, there will always be doubts in your mind...of whether she is worthy of your love and to be your wife...(because it was important enough for you to stay virgin till marriage)

Now, all this will be buried while things are going well...but the minute your marriage hits a rocky patch, as any married person will assure you will happen, those doubts will come back and play on your mind.

To you, I believe, the perceived value of being a virgin is so important that you may lose sight of another important element, that if you love the woman (your eventual wife I mean)...you should love the whole woman and not just her virginity...

On another note, as another bro has said, because you remain a virgin till your wedding night, you may incorrectly perceive yourself to have a higher value, meaning you bring a lot more to the relationship, as compared to her if she is no longer a vrgin...this creates for you an imbalance attitude towards your union.

What if she doesn't feel that you being a virgin is a big deal? Will that be neutral to you or will you feel slighted? Most people do not like to have their prized possession devalued or ignored.

So, if you truly want to keep to this...and I'm not in any way suggesting that you should not...seek out those groups ( I think church or youth groups are most common) who pledge themselves to keep their virginity till marriage...hangout with them. The likelihood of finding support and like-minded people will be of a lot of help to you...plus possibly the best place to find your eventual virgin bride.

With their support, you need not seek advise in a sex forum. To me, what you are doing is like a teetotaller going into a pub, facing a room full of people each holding a pint, and ask if it's ok to not drink alcohol and to you, drinking is not something they should be proud of; but at the same time want to know if buying alcohol from the pub, or 7-11 is ok, how they felt when they had their first drink and if they are alcoholics, will they tell their friends and family...
If you don't get booed out of the room, the guys are going to milk all the fun they can out of you....if you know what I mean...you should not go to a group, insult them for what they do (whether you meant to or not), then ask for advise from the same people you just insuted...that's just not a good strategy for getting information....

No disrespect to your life choice, but you really should seek a different forum for your questions.

.

Ichigo_Kurosaki · #15 01-10-2012, 09:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by littleredmill

I have done mostly a lot of things sexually but not penetration.

You did with your girlfriend or chicken?

Quote:

Originally Posted by littleredmill

so far even though I don't really have anyone standing on my side. Not even the girls. LOL.

Please clarify the confusion in post #8 when you said you:

"I find it hard to even do it with my ex-gf in the past " and "I never had a gf before "

Quote:

Originally Posted by littleredmill

But how do you all feel? Like your first time, what were you all thinking then? Or it's little brother's brain at work? Hahaha

We can think of all the words that can describe how we feel but you still won't get it.
Are you doing school project or research on this Virgin topic?