[freezetheDB]

Originally Posted by Dobernite

I broached the idea of divorce before we started a family, but she persuaded me to stay on the marriage, children after that but she systematically disabled me financially by taking over my bank account on the pretext of the kids. I love them and eventually surrendered all my income to her and given a monthly allowance of 500.... This gradually got reduced even as my salary grew exponentially...leaving me with just 160 pm....ridiculous as this barely enough for transport and I need to pay for own breakfast and lunch. I moonlight to survive and need to be careful not to let her know how much extra I earned. I never cheated on her in our 30 yr marriage until last year as life get so depressing and I needed some warmth.....we have slept separately and not have sex for 5 years, we hardly talk as we usually end up arguing when we do. We have a care but she refused to let me use it....even when I need to pick up the kids...I have to fetch them using public transport....but now My kids are finishing their schools n entering U soon. I plan to call it quit nce the younger one complete her Jc. We have a couple of properties here and Malaysia. If I initiate a divorce do have have a case on the ground if incompatibility? Would I need to pay alimony if I opt for gong up all my properties and savings in her hand except for one property in Malaysia? I have pretty good salary and prob can start all over again with my future earning good for about a decade more.

alimony depends on whether she wants to contest for it. Child maintenance will be awarded to her if she has custody of the kids.

Best is to talk through the terms and conditions with her and go for uncontested divorce.