Is there any sex consultant in SG?

[DemonicSS]

Originally Posted by kjjsexy

Wow, u can be a sex consultant liao!

Can I consult u? Hehe!

I'm 35 and hubby in his 40s and I've been with him since I was 19. At that time, I was easily aroused by fondling (due to prior experiences) but when it came to the sex act I was a total greenhorn. I didn't find it orgasmic and still preferred to masturbate with my pillow, how I used to. During our decade long couplehood, I even told him I disliked giving BJs and that he couldn't satisfy me during sex. Nevertheless, he initiated sex and I obliged.

After marriage and delivery of my 2 children, my focus shifted totally on them and since we had quarrels due to MIL and kids issues, we drifted apart and sex lessened. After I entered my 30s, I found myself having a higher sex drive and especially this year having discovered my hubby's bra fetish and me researching more into sex, it was like I hit sexual awakening at age 35. I began hankering after hubby for sex and when I could not get it I got emotional. My emotional outbursts stressed him alot and my aggressiveness puts him on the defensive.

Now I've tried very hard to get him to have regular sex with me as I need it, incorporating his bra collections and porn-viewing to entice him to have regular sex with me. I can have sex with him daily but our compromise is once a week but I'm working towards closing the gap to every 4-5 days. An I heading the right way? He also told me that he needed to self-stimulate though sex with me was pleasurable and that I had been accommodating to his needs. I wonder, since I've made myself so available, and he still needs to self-stimulate, does that mean he has some unfulfilled fantasies he can't share with me? How should I approach this and how should I manage my emotions?

Ok. let me try to have a go at this....

1) you can try to use his fetish to your advantage. You mentioned using his bra collection, but can you try communicating with him to get to understand what aspects he likes about it, then try to get him one to add into his collection. All boys like new toys, this shouldn't be any exception.

2) Try helping him to get off with your assistance. Make his enjoyment become yours. It will be taxing on you for awhile as you have to contribute first to his pleasure before yours. Things to note, you can never truly replace his own hands, but you can try getting to a position where he will be comfortable enough you doing it. Talk to him while HJ, asking him if he likes it, how he likes it etc..to know the way to do it. If words fail, ask him to use his hands over yours to know how to grip and how much pressure to apply. You may want to upgrade your HJ to a BJ to him later on. If he refuses on your offer, do not be discouraged. Explain that you want to be involved and to spend time together ( or something like that. Soft approach is always the best).

Once you get the groove going, and you have been offering say 5-10 bj/hj without any return from him, then start to barter with him for sex. Again, use his fetish to your advantage like buying another bra for him.

It sounds straightforward, but bear in mind to control your emotions.
Good luck to you. If it works, do tell, if it doesn't. post again or something.

[stealthraider]

1) how much older is your bubby than u? 40 plus men can sometimes have low sex drive due to lower testosterone.
2) pleasuring himself is rather selfish. maybe he's fulfilling some fantasy. or maybe masturbating allows him more time to get strong erection and release. have you 2 tried increasing foreplay time?
3) how about u do handjob on him? stroke his penis to initiate sex?
4) wear some sexy underwear, maybe it helps.
5) u have high sex drive now also because your body going through some hormonal changes. once hit mid thirties male or female will go through such changes. it's natural. some will suddenly get higher sex drive, some will be opposite.
6) work stress will also take the interest out of sex. masturbate is less demanding because it is about pleasuring oneself. but sex needs to be mutual.
7) need to explore the emotional aspect, the love feelings. if the feel is strong, can help in sex. as we grow older, physically we age and trying to rely on physical attraction like in younger days quite difficult. people who depend on physical attraction to get sexually arouse will tend to seek out younger partners. but couples who grow to love each other more with time will feel still attracted to each other.

Originally Posted by kjjsexy

Wow, u can be a sex consultant liao!

Can I consult u? Hehe!

I'm 35 and hubby in his 40s and I've been with him since I was 19. At that time, I was easily aroused by fondling (due to prior experiences) but when it came to the sex act I was a total greenhorn. I didn't find it orgasmic and still preferred to masturbate with my pillow, how I used to. During our decade long couplehood, I even told him I disliked giving BJs and that he couldn't satisfy me during sex. Nevertheless, he initiated sex and I obliged.

After marriage and delivery of my 2 children, my focus shifted totally on them and since we had quarrels due to MIL and kids issues, we drifted apart and sex lessened. After I entered my 30s, I found myself having a higher sex drive and especially this year having discovered my hubby's bra fetish and me researching more into sex, it was like I hit sexual awakening at age 35. I began hankering after hubby for sex and when I could not get it I got emotional. My emotional outbursts stressed him alot and my aggressiveness puts him on the defensive.

Now I've tried very hard to get him to have regular sex with me as I need it, incorporating his bra collections and porn-viewing to entice him to have regular sex with me. I can have sex with him daily but our compromise is once a week but I'm working towards closing the gap to every 4-5 days. An I heading the right way? He also told me that he needed to self-stimulate though sex with me was pleasurable and that I had been accommodating to his needs. I wonder, since I've made myself so available, and he still needs to self-stimulate, does that mean he has some unfulfilled fantasies he can't share with me? How should I approach this and how should I manage my emotions?

[jacky43]

Yes! We are all consultants although we have no licences. Then don't let this piece of paper prevent you from asking questions. All doctors who study IVF are sex consultants. Even urology too lest we forget mad doctors also are expect in this field.

This is only me. The karma which hit a sex worker during her last days on this world. I pretty much believe spirits of her customers will haunt her till the last breath. But why?

Mine times with them it all point towards $. How about customers? Maybe in Thai myth he will be reborn as a LB i don't know. I beg for forgiveness after every session.

Sorry this don't belongs to this thread.